Saturday, March 28, 2020

Letter During a Crisis


I hope this letter finds you safe, finds you healthy, and finds that, to the extent possible, you are home with family. We are hunkered down here on the north end of town, only going out when absolutely necessary. And I mean ONLY when it is absolutely necessary. We are staying in communication with family and friends ONLY via electronic modes of communication, and for the most part, everyone has been very understanding of our desire to keep family members safe as we practice social distancing. It has not been easy. This much I can say with absolute certainty. I think, however, that it is a necessary sacrifice to make at this time of uncertainty.

And I guess that is what is at the heart of all of this, right? Not the uncertainty of the virus - this much we know to be fact, as we watch the news and try to decipher truth and determine ways to keep ourselves safe and healthy. The uncertainty of knowing what tomorrow brings, however, is a different story. And even as I write this, I think to myself, "well, that's true no matter what the case, right? I mean, every day there is uncertainty." But this is different. This particular uncertainty is of a very different nature. This uncertainty, as we have seen, is truly a matter of life and death.

As I traverse any given school year, I keep this in mind when dealing with children, with their parents, with colleagues and with the leadership in the district: that there is much uncertainty in any situation we are dealing with. If a student gets into trouble, makes a bad decision, what is behind their thinking? If we are handling a particularly delicate situation, whatever that may be, what is the motive behind any one person's actions or words? What is it that makes someone behave in a particular way, or causes someone to react the way they do? In short - what is the uncertainty that every person brings to the table? Because this uncertainty is real, and it is invisible, and it is why, I guess, it is so hard to keep in mind when handling day to day situations as they come at people so quickly.

A long time ago one of my mentors taught me, when dealing with people, to remain firm on the issue but soft on the person. It is kind of the same lesson my Grandma taught us when she would remind us that we can "catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." I didn't know what it meant at the time, but I think I know now. When trying to help my 19 year old son understand the importance of staying at home, the importance of staying safe and the importance of refraining from hanging out with his friends, it would have been easy to use the reasoning that I have been so guilty of using in the past when I would say, "because I said so, that's why." Instead, I stayed the course, remaining firm on the issue but soft on him by reviewing the facts of our current situation and creating for him and for our entire family, reasons to stay home. Getting back to the basics of family. Getting back to our creative roots and doing what family does best - spending time together. This doesn't have to mean that we are all together, all the time; indeed, there is value in being alone. But it did force us to re-evaluate some of the priorities we held as important.

This is what uncertainty has done for us.

In the meantime, if you have gotten to the bottom of this letter, thank you for reading my ramblings. I also want to offer a couple of reminders and a word of encouragement. I want to remind your children, first off, that I miss them. Their teachers miss them. We all got into this profession because of our love and passion for working with youth, for being around young people, for helping students realize their potential to create a lasting change in this life. Please know that every one of us longs for the day we can return to the school building and see those faces again. Even at 6:50 in the morning when there are limited actual smiles... :)

Secondly, we don't stop learning just because we are not surrounded by the four walls that make up the traditional schoolhouse. We had a fantastic response to our first "digital learning" week last week, and this coming week will be more of the same. Please encourage your children to hang in there and keep up with their studies. And with the additional time they may have - hang out with family, play cards, read a good book or six, learn how to cook or sew, write for the love of writing, whether that be a short story, poem or play. DO something for the sheer joy of trying something new. That is where true passion and learning are at.

Here is the word of encouragement: FAITH. Have faith that whatever state of normal we end up with, that is where we will thrive. Together. As Warriors.

I look forward to hearing back from you or from your child(ren) if you are so inclined. I welcome the connection.

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